How to manage anger in your marriage?

When two people with different preferences, personalities and habits live under the same roof, there are bound to be instances where they will get irritated or angry with each other. Although it is common for couples to fight, especially once they have reached a comfort level amongst the two, it can get challenging to put up with a hot-tempered partner. At times, marriage is the source of motivation to build patience within oneself and control ones drastic emotional outburst. Some of the common reactions to frequent fights amongst couples include frustration, fear of losing oneself, hurt and anxiety. If you believe yourself to be one of them, this blog can give you some tips on how could possibly manage anger and create a healthy emotional well-being with your partner. 

Neutralize and de-escalate vulnerability and emotionality 

When you try controlling your partner while they are angry, it may only lead to further uncooperative and defensive behavior. It is totally unwise of one to get angry as a response to the partner’s anger. Let them calm themselves and subside their emotions. It is best to approach them when they can think rationally. In simple terms, this is called de-escalating the situation. By doing this, you are not only giving your partner some space but also the time to think about their behavior and contemplate on their wrong-doings. 

Be assertive yet respectful 

By acting assertive, you are taking the position to express your opinion at the same time respectfully considering your partner’s feelings and wants as well. When you speak in an assertive tone, your partner will be able to understand your strong feelings and how confident you are to voice them. This will allow both of you to communicate seamlessly, hence empowering your teamwork as a couple! 

Constructive communication, understanding and validation

In a marriage, people often become angry when the individual feels that they aren’t heard or taken seriously or think they are under-appreciated in the relationship. This may lead to them feeling disappointed and ignored. Hence, you must always know what your partner is feeling or at least have an idea about their thoughts. This can happen only if you have constructive communication where the individuals understand and validate every encounter in order to eliminate any sort of misunderstanding and overthinking. 

Practice compassion and patience

Beneath every angry person, there lies someone who is deeply hurt, frustrated and is unable to channelize their emotions. In fact, for a long period of time, the anger often is a disguise to make the person feel powerful and in control. It can be called the protection armor to the sensitive side of oneself. This is why it is important to show compassion towards your partner and try being as patient as possible.

However, many-a-times, the situation could perhaps go out of hand where the person may have lost himself in the relationship leading to mental disorders such as anxiety and depression. This is the time where you may need to seek some professional guidance and work towards a positive and harmonious mental well-being. Our experts at Evolve Brain Training are trained to exactly do this! For inquiries on the treatments and sessions, get in touch with us now by dialing –  +971 4 589 6983. 

Dr. Upasana Gala is the founder and CEO of Evolve Brain Training, a Neurofeedback centered institute that focuses on using non-invasive brain training techniques to maximize the brain's true potential.

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